December 2010
1 post
In Which I Am Irrationally Upset About Tapas
Wilto: It cannot compete with Razzy’s.
Kassie: Not for atmosphere, no.
Wilto: Nor affordability. Nor popcorn quality.
Kassie: There is no popcorn. One place gives out free tapas.
Wilto: Ridiculous. I don't want a stupid bowl of tiny potatoes with my beer. I want popcorn smothered in weird powdered chemicals.
Kassie: …
Wilto: “Tapas are dumb,” is what I’m getting at.
Kassie: Tapas are delicious.
Wilto: “Tapas is?”
Kassie: Good question.
Wilto: Is “tapas” the concept of stupid tiny potatoes—is it the goddamned philosophy of unsatisfying food portions? Or can I order one… Tapas? A tapa? Like, “I’ll just have a single tapa, please. I filled up on other molecules on my way over.”
Kassie: It’s a bunch of appetizers.
Wilto: So basically “tapas” is a lifestyle choice wherein one brings me irritating amounts of food.
Kassie: Also, patatas bravas are delicious.
Wilto: Holy Christ what is that even. “Brief potatoes?” That sounds like tapas, alright: “enjoy this three gram serving of baked potato, for it is fleeting.”
Kassie: They are potatoes with spicy sauce.
Wilto: Well I hate them.
Kassie: Good, more for me.